Something I thought I might have grown out of by now is a general dislike for uniformed authority. I cannot walk past a policeman in London without thinking, ‘Shiny-buttoned twat!’ or something equally sophisticated.
I have never met a copper I didn’t dislike immediately and enormously. I have at least a dozen stories about encounters with London Metropolitan goons and their laughable stupidity, and I shared a few of them with one of my recent acquaintances on a long coach journey. I made a crude and limited use of my vocabulary.
My friend smiled benevolently throughout. Later in the conversation I asked him what he plans to do when he gets back to the UK. You can guess the answer. I asked him why he would want to do such a thing in spite of evidence of him possessing intelligence, sensitivity and humanity. He smiled and said, ‘I just want to kick people’s doors in.’