Man v Fish

Snorkelling is a far more complicated affair than I could have imagined. You can clear your mask if it fills up without taking it off, you can dive to depths of ten metres then clear your snorkel without fully surfacing, and you can be attacked by big fish.

It never occured to me that you need to be wary of big fish that aren’t sharks. Which is why, when I spotted an enourmous grey gill-breather, I followed it with all the gusto of Steve Irwin, while he was still living and full of caffeine.

I was, I am told, lucky to escape with my toes. It was a Trigger fish, a variety of piscine unfriendly to humans during their season of courtship.

Perhaps when George Dubya Bush infamously expressed his belief that man and fish could one day peacefully co-exist, he wasn’t being quite as oafish as many thought. Perhaps he’d recently been snorkelling, and antagonised a Trigger fish.

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6 Responses to Man v Fish

  1. charlotte says:

    Haha! What is it with you and marine species?! First you get inked by an emotional squid and now you go chasing large angry fish. Just don’t go cage diving… ūüėõ

  2. Ray says:

    Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and he eats for life. Teach a man to snorkel and it seems that he eats until meeting a bigger fish.

    Circumspection is a healthy human survival attribute; I commend it. Darwin is still out there!

  3. McKinley says:

    I was terrified of trigger fish in Thailand. Did you know their territory is vertical rather than horizontal? Maybe that makes no sense. But they won’t attack you unless you’re in their territory. I saw one bite the flipper off my scuba instructor. I peed a little when it happened.

  4. charlotte says:

    I just google-imaged one. I’m quite concerned at how docile they look. I mean… it was practically Dory from Finding Nemo :S

  5. Rich says:

    My recent education about the mutual danger man and fish pose towards one another has served only to lessen my guilt at enjoying barracuda steaks on the beach.

    Genes would be no less likely to be propagated were I to be missing toes.

    McK, the vertical trigger fish zone is a weird one, for sure. Basically, in the future I won’t actively chase them. They’re not in mating season anyway.

  6. pete485 says:

    Oh man, everyone seems to have a trigger fish horror story but me!

    In other news, flights are booked and we’re off to Thailand at the beginning of June! Bangkok, Koh Pha Ngan and Koh Tao.

    Bring it on!!

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