We’re in the army now

Three months ago I was badly clippered by a cheap barber. He created a gap of about a centimetre between the top of my ears and my hairline. I asked for a grade four; he gave me a grade one. It may not come as a complete surprise to learn that the appearance of tall skinny guys is not much improved by a close crop. I emerged from the barber’s neon-lit establishment looking like a smackhead who had just joined the army.

I vowed to visit a proper salon the next time I needed a cut. Which is a different kind of embarrassment: it’s impossible to avoid the blow-drying and the straightening. It only took two days until my hair reverted to wavy normality, but for those two days I wanted to beat myself up every time I saw my reflection.

So, to cut to the chase, this David Mitchell monologue resonates with me.

David Mitchell is evidently a good name to have if you want to achieve something. I’m reading the the latest book by the other David Mitchell: The Thousand Autumns of Jacob de Zoet. I’ll leave the book-reviewing to the pros, but if you like fiction, you’ll like David Mitchell.

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3 Responses to We’re in the army now

  1. Guy says:

    The David Mitchell video is a little creepy. I think it is the lack of audience laughter I’m not used to.

    • recoder says:

      Hadn’t occurred to me. I’m oblivious to canned laughter. But it’s not that far removed from his Peep Show character’s extended monologues. Do you watch Peep Show?

  2. James says:

    More than 50% of the time a barber fucks up my sideburns whereby they either just take them up to my temples or finish them in a jaunty angle. Twits.

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